The Guardian today highlights one of the great scandals of our time. An outrage so, well, outrageous, that the country would, if we Brits had any decency, be protesting in the streets.

It is, of course, "UK poetry's ethnic imbalance".

Yup. Someone called Lara Pawson has penned a piece in the paper which appears to be serious, even though it just has to be a skit. I mean it just has to be...

She blames it on that nasty Jeremy Hunt, who somehow manages to retain office despite presiding over the terrible poetry ethnic imbalance.

So come on you lot. Rise from your torpor and demand that you pay more tax to tackle this outrage.

(The impact of Ms Pawson's last sentence is somewhat diluted when she bemoans the inevitably of his rise at some point to the Cabinet, despute refusing to tackle this terrible problem. So inevitable was it that it happened in May.)