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If we’re running the world, please can I be involved

To: The World Jewish Domination League

    Dear Chairman,

    Shalom.

    I obviously don’t get your memos.

    Everywhere, Jews are being credited with influencing world events, but I always seem to miss the boat.

    Turkey’s deputy prime minister now says that the “Jewish Diaspora” is responsible for the Gezi Park protests in Turkey. Why wasn’t I told about this?

    Anti-government protesters in Egypt put a picture of Mohammed Morsi on a Star of David — as if to say that he’s in league with the Jews. Is he? I should be informed of this [I’ve still got the old talking points from the original protocols…]

    Greek ministers are blaming the Jews for high unemployment in their country. Ditto in Hungary. How exactly are we doing this? Is it working? How do we keep it going? Where else can we do this?

    With so many Jews working behind the scenes in so many places [and with so few actual Jews in the world] surely I should be involved in at least one of these schemes, no?

    Dear World Jewish Domination League: please stop avoiding me, stop ignoring me. I have a lot to offer. I am a seasoned media manipulator and I can be very cunning. I want in on the action.

    Yours sincerely,

    Under-utilised, overlooked Jewish conspirator.

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