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The curse of noisy barmitzvah guests and other synagogue discontents

A survey of one of London's largest Orthodox congregations found disruptive visitors and lack of opportunities for women to be the main causes of dissatisfaction

December 2, 2019 10:56
The interior of Hampstead Garden Suburb United Synagogue

By

Simon Rocker,

simon rocker

3 min read

A large number of bnei mitzvot each year should be a sign of a thriving community. But for some members, it is a mixed blessing.

An influx of chattering visitors with little interest in the service beyond the bar- or batmitzvah’s performance can be infuriating for weekly regulars.

Indeed, in a survey done by Hampstead Garden Suburb Synagogue earlier this year, barmitzvah disruption was given as the main reason why some members had chosen to leave the main service and opted for alternatives instead.

In a report summarising the response to the survey, the following words captured the reaction: “Disrespect, mockery, disruption, talking continuously, feel alientated, influx of hordes, ghastly, invasion, galling, no sense of community, no place for me, not my shul, barmitzvah factory, circus.”