I woke up at 3am on Saturday night - well Sunday morning by that point.

A nightmare about my 8 year old having a stand up, shouty fight with a grown up did it. And then I couldn't get back to sleep. Thought of Seder were whirling around my head, so I got up, sat at my laptop and planned my First Night menus and logistics. 

One and a half hours and a filled out spreadsheet later, I returned to bed —my head clear, calm and as free as a slave liberated from Egyptian toil. 

I'd listed all the food we needed — from Seder service; eggs in salt water; main course, veggies and salads to the Pesach puds. Plus who would be providing it. Every year is a joint effort — me, my mother, sister-in-law (SIL) and mother-in-law (MIL) all chip in.

SIL, a great cook, and, has spent much of the last 20 years in Israel with her Sephardi former in-laws, and brings a Sephardi twist to our otherwise Ashkenazi menu. She's also a super talented artsy person, who always looks after table design. Last year she turned up with these gorgeous orange flowered plants - don't ask me what they were called - and proceeded to glue matzah sheets together to make a plant pot. They were so pretty. Apologies for the makeshift photos, but you get the idea.  

MIL makes the best Passover biscuits, and so brings enough cinnamon balls, coconut pyramids and almond macaroons to last the entire chag. 

Mummy is also an amazing cook, and way more organised than me. Had she been in charge, the menu would have been finalised ages ago. But she's not, and she has to endure the weeks of waiting to find out what she'll be contributing. This year, she's  in charge of charoset; a salad and the chocolate pavlova that my children are already requesting. 

Once I'd planned the menu, I allotted each of them a colour, and colour-coded the boxes on the spreadsheet. I then fired it off to each of them to check they were happy with their tasks. All very pleasing and all very 21st century. Back in their day, MIL and Mummy must have had to do the whole thing by hand and then spend who knows how long telephoning everyone to confirm! Not sure they'd have welcomed a call from me at 4am to pass on my Passover requirements... 

It brought to mind a box folder of neatly written menus and recipes from my great-auntie that my lovely cousin Jojo has lent me. Auntie Margaret listed every single meal she cooked when entertaining. I flicked through the books and found what I'd eaten when I visited her with my (late) father and my brother when I was 10. A piece of history in that box. I'll share that some day. 

I'm still stressed - I now have to buy and prepare all the food - but at least I know what I'm doing. It's all about the planning.