Become a Member

By

Dina Brawer

Opinion

Ritual focus risks losing the big picture

The JC Essay

February 22, 2013 10:13
7 min read

A couple of years ago I was having dinner with one of my closest friends, who has since passed away. She was not, strictly speaking, ritually observant although she was an extraordinarily charitable person and deeply concerned with the welfare of others. It was the last serious conversation we had - which might be why it remains etched in my mind. She referred to the fact that, unlike me, she was not religious.

I disagreed. I said that in certain respects I considered her to be more religious than myself. Religiosity, I explained, consists of two equally important relationships: Man-God and Man-Man. Granted, she neglected her Man-God relationship as defined by ritual observance, but she was deeply committed to that other important relationship. Who are we to decide which of the two merits the designation 'religious'?

Yet most of us are guilty of this bias. Try the following thought experiment. Your neighbour is in tears. Her son went off to Yeshiva in Israel for his gap year and now, she claims, he has returned 'crazy frum'. What does that term conjure up in your mind?

Most people would say it conjures up images of a young man who has become so religious that he will no longer eat in his parent's home, embrace female relatives, enjoy a night out at the cinema or even read secular books. Few would say it conjures up images of a young man who is so religious as to eschew pirate DVDs, refrain from purchasing products that make use of child labour or eat food that is sourced in an unethical way.

To get more from opinion, click here to sign up for our free Editor's Picks newsletter.