Male domestic abuse victim to set up charity

Abuse victim said he wanted to set up a charity because he wanted to be supported within a Jewish framework


Young sad mad sitting by the window in regret

A male domestic abuse victim who has been denied a religious divorce for 18 months is to set up a charity for men who are in similar situations.

“Mordy”, who shared his story with the JC in May, said he was unable to find support in the community and wanted to set up a charity to support men who find themselves in abusive relationships.

He said his charity, KAVOD, “would operate along similar lines to JWA (Jewish Women’s Aid)”, and said he had spoken to them about supporting his organisation “so that we don’t have to reinvent the wheel”.

JWA’s chief executive Naomi Dickson welcomed the move. “Having specialist services for people affected by domestic abuse is really important, so we welcome the idea of a professional service supporting Jewish men,” she told the JC.

“We have offered to support this new service by sharing some policies and advice. Existing national services like Respect could be a great source of information and guidance as they have many years’ experience supporting men, and Jewish Women’s Aid has referred men to them in the past.”

Mordy said that despite the existence of organisations such as Respect, a national charity that supports male and female victims of domestic violence, he wanted to be supported within a Jewish framework.

“I didn’t want to go to those organisations for the very same reason JWA exists,” he said.

“I didn’t want to be explaining every other word to someone, pausing to explaining Pesach, or what a get is.

“I wanted to be helped by people who understood me and understood my life.”

He has launched a crowdfunding campaign to help establish the charity and support his battle to get a civil and religious divorce. “This process has not been easy and I have had to engage solicitors at a tremendous financial cost to me and my family,” he said. “The stress and anxiety of my situation means I am unable to function at 100 per cent and I am currently earning at 25 per cent of my capacity.”

He said the money raised would support his case and help fund KAVOD to establish the only support service in the UK that supports Jewish male survivors of domestic abuse and coercive control.

Mordy said that when his relationship with his abuser began, it was “99 per cent love, one per cent coercion”. But, he added, “gradually, the amount of love went down as the coercion went up until it far outweighed the love.”


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