Life
I Wanted to be Wonderful review: The trials and tribulations of motherhood laid bare
This novel by Lihi Lapid follows two parallel stories to weave a heart-rending portrait of marriage and domesticity
October 21, 2025 11:41
This novel by Lihi Lapid follows two parallel stories to weave a heart-rending portrait of marriage and domesticity
October 21, 2025 11:41There is a scene in Lihi Lapid’s new novel about marriage and motherhood that rang so true I almost photographed it and sent it to my friends. In it the Israeli writer gives us a tantalising glimpse of a group of women, with shared histories, meeting up for a rare night together.
“And we’d sit and talk. This one talked about problems at work, this one about confrontations with the boss, this one about child-rearing problems, all of us about problems with teachers and nannies, and about the husband who didn’t understand… This is what we met for. This was what we needed. To share with one another the tiny details that no one else had the energy or strength to follow.”
It’s just one elegant paragraph in a quiet, unassuming book in which little happens. But, oh, how spot on it is. Essentially a novel about learning to be content with your own discontentment, it contains two parallels strands.
In one a woman (a version of Lapid herself) marries young and has two children in quick succession, having forgone an impressive career. As her husband forges ahead professionally, she grapples with her private struggles, among them her daughter’s early autism diagnosis.
The second strand is told as a fairytale, following a princess who gets her happily ever after only to find that life with her handsome prince is a tad more complicated. Instead of curses or wicked stepmothers, what sets the enchantment off course is the banality of ordinary life; fights about childcare and finances, and a couple growing apart without realising it.
It’s like an Elizabeth Jane Howard novel if she had written about baby groups and being late for pick up. As with Howard’s work, Lapid allows these everyday domestic concerns to be as important to character development as the demons and dragons male protagonists in fiction are expected to slay.
To some extent, it offers a dim view of marriage, intriguingly so given that Lapid is the wife of former Israeli Prime Minister Yair. But it’s also cathartic, as the narrator realises the fairytale was never real, but also that we all perceive the grass to be greener. In the end, all you can do is celebrate what you have. Not necessarily an original message, but one that Lapid shares beautifully.
The book is published by Zibby Publishing, set up by US Jewish book blogger and media star Zibby Owens, and I hope this slightly unusual home still enables the book to reach a wide audience. As a mother of two young children I’ve rarely read anything as honest. All of us are struggling, says Lapid, and none of us find it easy. Take comfort in that, if nothing else.
I Wanted to be Wonderful by Lihi Lapid
Zibby
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