In recent months, much has been said about the rise in antisemitism and the fear it is creating within our community. But there is a quieter story that is not being told.
At JTeen, we are not seeing a surge of panic from young people, and that in itself should concern us because it is easy to assume that if our children are not panicking, they must be coping. I don’t think they are.
What we are seeing is not panic, but adaptation. Young people are thinking more carefully about where they go, avoiding certain areas, and being more measured about how openly they present themselves as Jewish. Much of this is not being spoken about. It is simply becoming part of how they live. As a psychotherapist, I am far more concerned about the fear we don’t hear than the fear we do.
We see this reflected in our national support line for Jewish youth. After major incidents, there is often a surge in calls. We saw it in the aftermath of the October 7 attacks, and again following incidents closer to home. But what concerns me most is how quickly that surge disappears. Not because the fear has gone, but because it has been absorbed.
Recently, a teenage girl messaged the support line. On the surface, nothing sounded dramatic. She was still going to school, still seeing her friends, and still getting on with life. But as the conversation unfolded, small details began to emerge. She had started keeping her Star of David necklace tucked inside her shirt, avoided certain routes home, and her parents had quietly arranged a rota so she would not have to take public transport alone. “It just makes sense right now,” she wrote.
Another young person told us they had stopped going to an area they used to enjoy going to, not because anything had happened to them, but because it no longer felt worth the risk. One girl with non-Jewish friends said she now thought twice before mentioning anything Jewish in public conversations. None of this was described as anxiety. It was simply seen as being sensible.
I don’t think what we are seeing is calm. I think it is anxiety that has quietly become normal. What looks like coping on the surface is often containment underneath. Young people are carrying on, but they are doing so by adjusting around the fear rather than dealing with it. Containment helps in the short term, but it is not a solution. What is not spoken about is not processed, and what is not processed does not go away. Instead, it shapes behaviour so young people become more watchful, more cautious, and more avoidant. Their world begins to shrink. What feels protective in the moment can, over time, strengthen the very fear they are trying to manage. And I think we need to ask ourselves whether we are mistaking this for resilience.
So, what should parents be looking out for? Not just obvious distress, but quiet changes. A child who is going out less, avoiding certain places, or behaving differently in small but noticeable ways. And most importantly, a child who is not saying anything at all.
The most important thing parents can do is not to assume everything is fine simply because nothing has been said. Instead, gently check in. Not just asking: “Are you OK?” but: “What has changed for you recently?” Creating space for an honest conversation, without rushing to reassure or fix, is often what young people need most.
There are real safety concerns that must be taken seriously. But we also need to be careful that fear does not quietly take over without us noticing.
At JTeen, we remain available for any young person who needs support.
No Jewish young person should have to carry that alone.
Yaakov Barr is the CEO of JTeen
To contact JTeen or JStudent, go to: jteen.co.uk
The Samaritans can be contacted out of hours on 116 123 or text: SHOUT to 85258 (Both are free and 24/7)
In an emergency, call 999
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