Mum’s the word for Facebook hit

Users may be after more than advice. “A week cannot go by without some controversy. One Jewish woman shamed her husband on the group for sleeping with the au pair. It got rude.

When she stood up for Israel during the Gaza conflict, 600 members left the group

“Also, when someone asks: ‘How much should I pay my cleaner?’ I know that it is going to cause World War Three. Some cleaners reply: ‘Who do you think you are only paying us £8 an hour?’

“A lot of the time it turns into: ‘The Jewish ones are the stingy ones.’

“When I see a post like that on the group, I just delete it. Anything that disses Jewish people, I delete.

“It is also very controversial when people ask for ‘a Filipino’. A lot of Jewish people know what that means — a house cleaner who works very hard, with a lot of responsibility, for a lot of money. Even Filipinos call themselves Filipinos. We all know the term.

“But non-Jewish people on the group go insane when they see that. I have to stick up for the women who ask the question. They do not mean it in a bad way. It is the same thing when people ask for a ‘Jewish nanny’. I have to explain to [critical] people that they might need the nanny to understand kashrut rules.”

Ms Toubian sees her moderating responsibility as extending to attacks on Israel.

During the Gaza conflict last summer, she used the page as a way of combating anti-Israel discourse. “I was so angry about everything going on in the news, the media and BBC bias against Israel. I was so shocked, I could not believe it. I thought: ‘Right, I am going to use my group to promote Israel.’

“People did get angry — around 600 members left. Some said, ‘This is not a political site,’ and went off to start their own groups. I said, ‘I do not care. It is my group and I can do what I want with it. If you do not like it, you can lump it and leave.’ I was sick and tired of false allegations being made about Israel.

“I am outspoken. I have very strong opinions and I get angry when people don’t agree with them,” she adds, laughing.

But the group has also generated strong friendships and boosted local businesses — from hairdressers to plumbers and carpet cleaners. The majority of those promoting their businesses are also Jewish.

Ms Toubian, 38, who has a background in recruitment, launched the group for the mums who attended her Tricky Vicky music classes for children aged six months to four years old, where she performs puppet shows and lively versions of nursery rhymes.

She saw the mums sharing advice and encouraged them to share their stories on the Facebook page.

“Mums love giving other mums advice and tips,” she reflects.

“When my friends become mums for the first time, I am always giving them advice. I say, ‘You have got to get this pushchair, cot, bib, dummy.’ I have always been like that.

“So I just thought, instead of us sitting in a room talking about ideas, let us put them on Facebook. The group just grew by word of mouth. People wake up in the morning to check Top Tips 4 Mums. It has become part of their routine.”

She has herself taken the advice of group members on issues involving her children — Aaron, nine, Lielle, five, and three-year-old Coby.