Lived Experiences Heard: Real Voices, Real Change was the theme of this year’s World Mental Health Day on October 10. David* explains how support from a Jami peer support worker, with lived experience of mental illness and distress, helped him to overcome his own mental health challenges.
“I’ve had periods of depression my whole life, but then I had a crisis, probably brought on by feeling isolated. I wasn’t getting the contact I needed at the time. I was very, very anxious and everything just started getting on top of me. I couldn’t cope with even basic tasks. I remember developing a problem with mould in my flat, but I didn’t know how to deal with it. Some days, I could barely do anything at all. I had to take time off work but that didn’t really help because it just meant I was more isolated. I’d also been prescribed medication, but it seemed to make my condition worse. Friends and family were really worried about me.
My rabbi recommended I contact Jami (Jewish Care’s mental health service). I had an assessment and was offered peer support. I didn’t know what it meant at that point, but I agreed to it and was put in touch with Rachel.* Initially, we met online and later, in person at Jami’s Head Room café in Golders Green.
Because Rachel has had her own experience of mental illness, as well as knowing a great deal about mental health issues, she really understood how I was feeling. We hit it off from the start. Rachel’s an excellent listener and very empathetic. There was something very warm and human about our relationship. It was like being with a friend – only better.
The difficulty in telling close friends or family about how you’re feeling is that you don’t want to upset them. So, you hold things back because you don’t want to make them worried. But with Rachel, I could say anything to her. I could talk to her about difficulties I was having with work and with relationships and feel like she was not just giving me directive advice. It was also very helpful that I could talk to her about being Jewish, and my concerns about what was happening to the community.
Our sessions together were holistic. She would listen to all sorts of different problems and ask pertinent and insightful questions. And although Rachel would ask me about my emotional and mental health problems, I always felt she was also interested in me as a person. She has a stability and strength of character that made me feel I could say anything to her – even my worst fears – without her panicking. She didn’t judge me in any way.
As a peer support worker, Rachel made me feel that my emotions were valid and acceptable, and that what I was going through was something that many other people have been through too, rather than something that somehow diminishes me as a person.
I still have bad days, of course, but I also have good days, and I generally feel a lot better. I’ve made changes too. I’m still with the same employer, but I found a role which is much less stressful. I’m now more involved in Jewish life than I was before, and the community is something that really does help support me.
If someone came to me in the same situation I was in, I would certainly recommend peer support. I think in many ways it has made me more resilient. It has helped me to take better care of myself and be a little less judgemental of myself. I really owe so much to Rachel for helping me get through that period. As somebody who experienced difficult situations herself in the past and came through it, Rachel inspired me to do the same.”
*Names have been changed to protect confidentiality.
If you or someone you know needs mental health support, click here or visit jamiuk.org/get-support or click here, call 020 8458 2223 or text Jami to 85258
To get more from community, click here to sign up for our free community newsletter.