We were invited to a Jewish wedding somewhere near Hampstead. We didn’t need an A to Z or Satnav as we just followed all the silver-coloured Mercs and 4x4s to the wedding. Honestly when we got there it was like Alan Day’s showroom.
We had to borrow a skullcap. These came in all different colours but the one I got matched my suit. It was like going to a fashion show, the way these people dressed. Afterwards we fancied a drink at the reception but all we could find were these wimpish strawberry daiquiris. Well at least we didn’t have to pay for them. We recall going to a Jewish wedding in Paris some years ago where we actually had to pay the photographer for the photos he took of us as guests. They were laid out on a table in the reception area after the dinner. We thought that was really mean.
The food and the dancing was way OTT. It must have cost our Jewish friends a large fortune and mortgaged them for years. You know, we would just have the wedding ceremony in the church for our close family followed by a simple but pleasant wedding lunch in a decent local hotel for family and friends. All eminently affordable, particularly in these difficult times.
With apologies to NW Jew