We were invited to a Jewish wedding somewhere near Hampstead. We didn’t need an A to Z or Satnav as we just followed all the silver-coloured Mercs and 4x4s to the wedding. Honestly when we got there it was like Alan Day’s showroom.
We had to borrow a skullcap. These came in all different colours but the one I got matched my suit. It was like going to a fashion show, the way these people dressed. Afterwards we fancied a drink at the reception but all we could find were these wimpish strawberry daiquiris. Well at least we didn’t have to pay for them. We recall going to a Jewish wedding in Paris some years ago where we actually had to pay the photographer for the photos he took of us as guests. They were laid out on a table in the reception area after the dinner. We thought that was really mean.
The food and the dancing was way OTT. It must have cost our Jewish friends a large fortune and mortgaged them for years. You know, we would just have the wedding ceremony in the church for our close family followed by a simple but pleasant wedding lunch in a decent local hotel for family and friends. All eminently affordable, particularly in these difficult times.
With apologies to NW Jew
To get more from opinion, click here to sign up for our free Editor's Picks newsletter.