Like other JC readers who are ballroom fans, I couldn’t wait for the new season of Strictly. But I wanted to shout “BRING BACK ARLENE at the screen as I watched Alesha Dixon so fail to fill Arlene’s dancing shoes - and judging by the complaints jamming the BBC switchboard, I wasn’t alone.
Although I’m not Arlene, I do own a dancing school and have made crack dancers out of hundreds of Londoners who started from scratch. So here are my own professional observations on the new crop of Strictly contestants.
Martina Hingis & Matthew Cutler A great shame Matthew Cutler is out of the running so soon; he is a fantastic dancer. Although Martina should have been in the dance-off, it should have been with Joe Calzaghe who shows no talent whatsoever.
Joe Calzaghe & Kristina Rihanoff It will take a miracle to turn him into a dancer with the grace required. But the British public do so love to support a lost cause so I expect he can look forward to a long run.
Ali Bastian & Brian Fortuna were exquisite – she is so lucky to be dancing with him – I must find out how to get a private lesson!
Lynda Bellingham & Darren Bennett – It must be terrifying to have to perform in public having spent so little time in the studio. As she representing my generation I will give her all the support I can. If she is listening to my comments she needs to be lighter on her feet.
Chris Hollins & Ola Jordan Congratulations, Chris. You are what the dance industry needs – a sporty guy who can turn the hand, eye, foot co-ordination that made you a sportsman into great technique on the dance floor. When this is over I would love to offer you an invite to come to my men’s dance classes – you would be a great ambassador!
Ricky Groves & Erin Boag – Ricky, you were wonderful – I think you show great promise. Just relax; we need guys like you to lead the way and bring men onto the dance floor.
Jade Johnson & Ian Waite – Jade, you also show great promise and how lucky you are to be dancing with Ian Waite – I still remember how he turned his previous partners into stylish dancers.
Ray Wilding & Aliona Vilani – I am so glad Ray was saved last night – he shouldn’t have been in the dance-off at all as he did a great job. Keep going - we need more men like you to show how much fun dancing can be.