Since King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines, according to the Bible, it is not surprising that many peoples claim the energetic sovereign to have been their ancestor.
The representative of a new group of reputed descendants has emailed us for help, from Fiji. The Itaukei Jews - itaukei means "indigenous" in Fijian - wish to be recognised as of the faith and request a visit from our "chief president" to research their history and genealogy.
The Chief President of Furnival Street is packing his coconut cutter at this very minute, for in return for our aid, we are promised that 10 per cent of any investment in tourism in the South Pacific will be "donated to the Jews chronically".