The JC Blind Date: ‘I was hoping for a man who likes a challenge’

​What were you hoping for from the evening?

Ultimately, to connect with someone who could be my life partner. I have never been married and I’d love to honour my mother and father by doing so. My dream would be to get married at Bevis Marks Synagogue. I don’t go on dating sites or apps so it would be nice if I could meet someone in a traditional way.

​Did the conversation flow?

It certainly did. We talked for more than three hours without any awkward pauses. I was intrigued by what she had to say.

​Did you discuss matters Jewish?

Yes, especially in relation to our backgrounds. I am from a traditional Sephardi background and grew up in Stamford Hill. She’s a secular New Yorker who’s more left-of-centre than me.

We also discussed how bleak things have become for the diaspora since October 7. She knows a lot more about the geopolitics of all this.

​Did you discuss matters Israeli?

A little and it was clear that she feels more connected to Israel than I do.

​Would Rebecca get on with your friends?

I think she would get on with most people.

​Did you discover people in common?

No. She’s a townie who lives, works and socialises in central London and who doesn’t keep kosher. I am more suburban.

​Did sparks fly?

No

Any no-nos?

Her work commitments seem overwhelming.

​Plans to see each other again?

Unless I get invited to one of her seminars, this feels unlikely.

​Rebecca in three words?

Determined, engaging, personable.

​What do you think Rebecca thought of you?

Handsome, attentive and gentlemanly (I hope). I did offer to take her home – well, to drop her at the top of her road. She refused.

[Missing Credit]

Rebecca, 55, is an adviser to a member of the House of Lords

Pre-date jitters?

I always have jitters! I don’t have time to date very much and the last time I did it with any gusto, John Major was the prime minister, apps didn’t exist and neither did mobile phones. It’s also a bit tougher because, I’m going to be diplomatic here, the pool of men over 50 is very shallow and they are usually single for good reason. I’m not a brain-dead Pilates devotee or a bagel-belt princess with a shul hat collection. I was hoping for a man who likes a challenge.

Your first impression?

That he was good-looking but a bit quiet. Nerves, maybe?

What were you hoping for from the evening?

To meet a really kind man with a sparkling intellect who wouldn’t run screaming for the hills or look like a deer caught in the headlights. I wouldn’t rule out getting married again but finding someone to chat with while cooking dinner together and rehashing the day at work would be a good start. They don’t have to be in the Westminster Bubble but they do have to understand how the world actually works.

Did the conversation flow?

The conversation was perfectly pleasant. We come from very different worlds. Mark is a Sephardi East Ender and we chatted a bit about the food his family eats. I don’t think I have met any other Calcutta Jews and the Indian meal was very much up his cultural street. We talked about what we do in our spare time. I’m currently replanting my garden, which is something I never thought I would do. Mark is retired so we talked about his volunteering with a cat rescue charity. He is also a committed bridge player. We both have an interest in wine. Mark is pescatarian while I eat everything and love to cook ambitiously. It’s possible that Mark would have had a better time talking about Spurs all night with the photographer.

Did you discuss matters Jewish?

We did, including levels of observance. As I said, I eat everything. I kept a kosher home for 25 years under duress and I am not going back to that mishegoss. Mark’s family is Sephardi Orthodox and I am from a Woody Allen film (the early, funny ones). I’m New York, hyper-educated (Jewish and secular). I light the Shabbat candles and then go out for moo shu pork! I don’t think that’s Mark’s vibe. I think I go to synagogue more than he does.

Did you talk about Israel?

Not much. Mark has only been there a few times. We did agree that Caesarea would be a great place to live.

Would Mark get on with your friends?

Not sure he would gel with them. They are very intellectually intense.

Did you discover people in common?

We didn’t play much Jewish geography. I don’t think we have anyone in common. Different worlds, I think.

Did sparks fly?

Not for me, sadly

Any no-nos?

I do think it’s a red flag when someone hasn’t had any long, serious relationships by their fifties. Plus, I don’t like football, cats or bridge. I work a lot and enjoy it. I’m not interested in being a bored man’s new hobby.

Plans to see each other again?

I think I politely swerved giving Mark my number. He did offer to drive me home, which was very gentlemanly, but it was a quick bus ride and I knew we weren’t a match.

Mark in three words?

Handsome, retired and retiring.

What do you think Mark thought of you?

Probably that I was a dog-rescuing heathen with cleavage.

Credit: Gary Manhine[Missing Credit]