People will react to synagogue services in different ways. But when a woman in her 60s cried throughout one of Rabbi Miriam Berger’s services at Finchley Reform Synagogue a few years ago, the minister felt compelled to ask her why.

The woman explained that she had not been to shul since her son, who has learning difficulties, was three. At that time, his behaviour had been deemed “inappropriate”.

Her son, now in his 40s, was holding her hand at the Finchley Reform gathering — the first of its B’yachad (Together) services — welcoming people with learning disabilities, autism and physical disabilities. They were also open to anyone with a readiness to get to know people whose behaviour might (sadly even today) be considered “inappropriate”.

Rabbi Berger recalls this incident in the introduction to the new Accessible Siddur, published by JWeb. “Finally,” she writes, “this woman and her son had found a welcoming minyan. May nobody feel excluded from shul for 40 years and may we create prayer spaces where we can truly pray b’yachad, together.”

It is understandable to be left cold by words such as “inclusivity” and “accessibility”. In order to better understand them, let’s dispense with what they do not mean. Accessibility does not mean laying down a board over steps for wheelchair users and ticking a box. Inclusivity does not mean allowing people in and ticking a box.

True accessibility is the removal of all barriers — physical and mental — that might stop a person with a learning disability or autism etc from joining in. True inclusivity is the idea that we must not only allow everyone into our communal spaces. We must also make them feel welcome, be inquisitive about their needs and tailor our practices and working methods accordingly.

In other words, we need the tools. And the first tool is the Accessible Siddur. But the main challenge, as the panel for a recent discussion on inclusivity hosted by the Board of Deputies agreed, is one of education and enlightenment among the wider community.

Norwood chief executive Dr Beverley Jacobson told that panel: “After my first daughter had been diagnosed with a learning disability, I experienced the pain of being marginalised by society. The people that Norwood supports are already on the periphery and it is our ultimate aim to create a society that works for everyone. The key is connectedness with the community and making bridges.”

So what are the logistical hurdles to overcome? Let’s start with what Rabbi Berger and her congregants describe as “heckling”. She explains that over the years, the B’yachad services have put more people with special needs into contact with the community. “So when a member of our congregation with, say, a learning disability, does something in a certain way, we have an understanding of that behaviour and a language to use around those actions because we know the individual.”

Alongside the correct tools, we also need the access points and, as things stand, there are eight synagogues in the UK which regularly run inclusive services. Remarking on one such recent service at Mill Hill United, the Chief Rabbi said: “Everything about the Shabbat of Inclusivity is music to my ears. I would like to recommend this idea to every single one of our communities… And how about us guaranteeing that every single Shabbat will be a Shabbat of Inclusivity.”

The paradox is that offering inclusive services and events at communal institutions but running them alongside regular ones rather defeats the central purpose of “inclusion”. So while inclusive services may be currently needed, they must be viewed as the gateway rather than the end goal.

Deborah Gundle, one of the JWeb founders, recalls: “The first time I went to an inclusive service, I also cried all the way through because for the very first time my son and my family were accepted and valued for who we are and as we are. You can see immediately what Jewish communal life means to people with learning disabilities. Through being included, my son comes to shul and is welcomed and warmly greeted by friendly faces. This in itself gives a meaning to the week.”

In creating the Accessible Siddur, JWeb — a cross-communal resource collating information for those with learning disabilities in the Jewish community and beyond — took inspiration from a former Norwood volunteer, the late Mitch Wax, a pioneer of inclusive Shabbat services. Wax and a team of volunteers were running services for residents of Norwood’s Ravenswood site more than 30 years ago and Gundle is quick to give credit where it is due: “Anna Perceval, who compiled the siddur with me and my co-founder Linda Goldberg are standing on people such as Mitch Wax’s shoulders. But this isn’t just about a siddur. This is a starting point and, hopefully, the siddur will open doors to the next thing — proper inclusion.”

Is there any halachic instruction that prevents shuls from opening their doors fully? Not really, according to Norwood’s Jewish cultural adviser Dov Richman.

“Most people do not go to shul only for intimate prayers. They can do that at home. They go for the warmth and to be a part of the community. And though we are instructed to pray with kavanah [intention], there are no set rules for what it means to pray with focus. For someone with a learning disability, it is perfectly reasonable to expect their kavanah to be different to mine. Whatever distractions there might be, most people should be able to focus on their own prayer.”

Rabbi Berger maintains that “we need to be shouting about inclusivity from the rooftops. If our institutions have felt like places where people were not welcome, then we have to shout that we are welcoming and open. One of the challenges here is that we learn that people with certain disabilities or conditions are not obligated to take part in communal activities and perhaps, in the past, we have interpreted that to mean ‘not needed’. But complete inclusion is both entirely needed and entirely in keeping with Jewish thought.”

In Dr Jacobson’s summation: “The challenges we’ve all experienced this year — restrictions, lack of connectivity, social isolation — are not new for people with a learning disability.

“Our ‘new normal’ is what most of them have grown up with and so when life does get back to ‘old normal’, we must make sure that we use that time as an opportunity to reset those parts of our community that are not there to be used, valued and enjoyed by everyone.”

Simmy Richman is a journalist and a senior copywriter for Norwood. The Accessible Siddur is available as a free download via https://www.jweb.org.uk/blog/jweb-accessible-siddur-resources-pack. Or for a physical copy, for £14 from Amazon or direct from JWeb (email jweb@jweb.org.uk)