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StevenKalka

Classic Jewish Mother Jokes

By StevenKalka, February 7, 2012

From the Jewish Joke List

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER:
"After all the money your father and I spent on braces, this you call a smile?"

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' JEWISH MOTHER:
"I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call, you didn't write."

MICHELANGELO'S JEWISH MOTHER:
"A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the walls, like the other children?

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Possible Defense of Anti-Semitic Egg Attack

By StevenKalka, December 23, 2011

http://www.thejc.com/news/uk-news/60852/man-questioned-over-antisemitic-...

If the defendant wants to show real chutzpah, he'll claim that if he were truly anti-semitic, he would have tossed a plate of ham and eggs at the victims; but was respectful enough to avoid anything non-kosher.

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Old Jewish Catskill Comedian's Classic Jokes

By StevenKalka, December 21, 2011

You've probably heard these before, but they are still funny.

Those fabulous Jewish
Comedians, many of whom started in the Jewish Catskills:

Shecky Greene,
Red Buttons,
Totie Fields,
Joey Bishop,
Milton Berle,
Jan Murray,
Danny

Kaye,
Henny Youngman,
Buddy Hackett,
Sid Caesar,
Groucho Marx,
Jackie Mason,
Victor Borge,
Woody Allen,
Joan Rivers,
Lenny Bruce,

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Jewish Country and Western Song Titles

By StevenKalka, December 19, 2011

1. Honky Tonk Nights on the Golan Heights

2. I Balanced your Books, but you Broke My Heart

3. Same Bottle of Whiskey, Same Old Testament

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The History of the Air Conditioner - Tribal Humor

By StevenKalka, December 19, 2011

The three Goldberg brothers, Norman, Hyman, and Maximillian invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner.

On July 17th, 1946, the temperature in Detroit was 97º.

The 3 brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's office and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that 3 gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry since the electric starter.

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Answer to "What I Want to Know"

By StevenKalka, November 21, 2011

"What I want to know is...

How is it that someone ( who happens to be an Arab ), whose parents and generations before them, who fled Haifa in a war situation, have less right to live in Haifa then some American or Russia ( who happens to be Jewish ),and whose only claimed connection is that thousands of years ago some people of vaguely similar ethnicity lived around there ?" asks Katie.

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Roger Waters to wed in 2012

By StevenKalka, November 20, 2011

Roger Waters will remarry in 2012 for the 4th time. Will the couple honeymoon in the Gaza or in the West Bank?

http://www.contactmusic.com/news/roger-waters-to-wed-for-fourth-time-in-...

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Wonderful Memories of the Jewish Catskills

By StevenKalka, October 17, 2011

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7I1izk2NWFY&feature=related

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Conversion to Judaism

By StevenKalka, October 9, 2011

There was once a woman who wanted to become Jewish to please her Jewish husband. So, she went to see a rabbi. After a long process, the rabbi told her to enter a mikvah and dunk her head.

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Jewish Identity by Name - Isaac Asimov

By StevenKalka, September 27, 2011

Famed science fiction writer Isaac Asimov was a noted atheistic Jew. According to a condensed biography of his 3 part autobiography by his widow, "It's Been a Good Life", he once gave a presentation or lecture on Rosh Hashanah. A couple of days later he received an angry call from someone asking him why he was trying to hide being Jewish.

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Israel is a unique western style country

By StevenKalka, September 7, 2011

"Of course otherwise it wouldn't be a western style country
doh !!!!!!" says Ben F

Israel is the only western style nation surrounded by all hostile non-western Islamic nations. It's neighbors do not accept non-Islamic rule over formerly Islamic nations. Israel is western like in terms of institutions such as industry, technology, education.

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Ignore the anti-semites and self-hating Jews

By StevenKalka, September 5, 2011

If you're at a party and you find individuals on a totally different wavelength from you despite many discussions and nothing further can be gained, it's best to ignore them. Either they'll leave or just talk among themselves.

The same should apply here.

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Difference between St. Andrew's incident and the West Bank

By StevenKalka, August 25, 2011

In the accidental tragic killing of the 67 year old man in the West Bank, the IDF were raiding a Hamas cell. That raid was legitimate business.

In the other incident, the Jewish student had every right to keep an Israeli flag between his bed and the wall. What the offender did was no accident. Inebriation is no excuse.

In western legal systems, intent is 90% of the law.

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Park Slope Brooklyn Food Co-op proposes boycott of Israel

By StevenKalka, August 19, 2011

Another business proposes a boycott of Israel, a food co-op in a trendy lefty brownstone neighborhood in Brooklyn. I've never heard about this happening in traditional for profit grocery stores and supermarkets.

http://www.tabletmag.com/life-and-religion/75046/food-fight-2/

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More on US Subprime Mortgage Crisis

By StevenKalka, August 19, 2011

Economist Thomas Sowell comments on the US Subprime Mortgage Crisis. He faults federal mortgage policy that forced banks to grant mortgages to applicants with questionable credit worthiness. What's notable is that Thomas Sowell
is an African-American who sees through all that malarkey.

http://townhall.com/columnists/thomassowell/2011/08/02/misleading_words