Melchett Mike

Big Boys, Little Boys and Ladyboys

By Melchett Mike, December 8, 2011

Friday, October 28, 2011. The departure lounge of AeroSvit flight VV238 to Kiev. The atmosphere couldn’t be more different from that of an El Al flight. Rather, there is no atmosphere. It could be pre-Gorby Russia.


On yer bike: The myth of the caring society?

By Melchett Mike, October 19, 2011

I have not made the most auspicious of starts to the New Year.


Watering the beasts: a lesson in comparative religion

By Melchett Mike, October 1, 2011

Striding down Shderot Yerushalayim (Jerusalem Boulevard) last week, running late for an appointment in south Jaffa, Stuey and Dexxy, starting to wilt under the midday sun, were desperately trying to pull me off the tarmacked sidewalk and under the shade of each and every tree.


Why I am not full of the joys of Spring

By Melchett Mike, September 3, 2011

You will forgive me, I hope, for not jubilantly swinging my misbaha over my head in celebration of the Arab Spring.


Movers and Svetas: Aspects of the Russian Aliyah

By Melchett Mike, August 27, 2011

Most things in life never turn out to be quite how we imagine them. A notable exception to this, however, is Russian movers (although not being one to generalise, I use “Russian” to describe any individual from any one of the 15 former Soviet Republics).


Just scum, innit

By Melchett Mike, August 21, 2011

“What is going on in England, Mike?!”

Recent unrest in the Mother Country has given Israeli friends and colleagues the opportunity – in which they have revelled – to make the point that the English are not that much more civilised than the “monkeys” whom I so consistently (if jokingly . . . well, semi) disparage.


Stop, hey, look what's going down on Rothschild

By Melchett Mike, July 29, 2011

"There's something happening here, what it is ain't exactly clear . . ."


Be a wise buyer, not a foreign freier: a guide to the world of Israeli real estate

By Melchett Mike, July 24, 2011

melchett mike is about to join that quirky list of institutions (London Irish, Scottish and Welsh rugby clubs spring to mind) whose names no longer accurately describe them.


How does it feel . . . to be taken for a ride?

By Melchett Mike, July 12, 2011

It was Jonny Levene – whose taste in music (if not quiffs) was way ahead of that of the rest of us – who first introduced me to the great man, circa 1983/4.


In the name of the father, and of his son, and of this belated post: my Ireland trip

By Melchett Mike, June 28, 2011

“I am always going to fly on Saturdays from now on,” spits my sixty-something neighbour from Maccabim – taking a breather from “my son with the start-up” – on our EasyJet flight from Luton. “It is just so much nicer without the ‘penguins’.”


The Witriol Diaries, Part V (Hasmo Legends XXIV)

By Melchett Mike, May 25, 2011

Once again, I am not going to post this one in full here, but if you are an ex-Hasmo - or merely curious to read the diary of a teacher in the madhouse in the 60s/70s - here is the final part (V) of The Witriol Diaries . . .




Whose catastrophe is it anyway?

By Melchett Mike, May 18, 2011

Driving past the Tel Aviv Cinematheque on Sunday evening, I witnessed the kind of scene which, though no longer new to me, never fails to sicken me anew: on this occasion, a demonstration by around a hundred keffiyeh-wearing Israelis to mark Yawm al-Nakba, or Day of the Catastrophe, on which Palestinians mourn the birth of Israel, in 1948.


The Piano Nobile (and the wine that is never mine)

By Melchett Mike, May 15, 2011

After years of cunning and deceit, I have finally been found out. Well, almost.

When it comes to wine-giving, I have always been firmly of the Costanza school of thought: it is pointless being overly, or even at all, beneficent when no one knows, or remembers, which bottle was yours.


Vedding?! . . . Ye call dat a vedding?!

By Melchett Mike, May 3, 2011

Having ignored invitations to various Anglo-Israeli Royal Wedding bashes – quite apart from my already admitted davka-ness, why would I chance having to share such a uniquely British occasion with Israelis, Americans and, worst of all of course, French?


Accadia kerfuffle: Enough with this football mishigas!

By Melchett Mike, April 28, 2011

Who says it is only working class goyim who fight on holiday? Or that only Catholics and Protestants mix religion, football and violence?


Jews and Germany: Still that fascination of the abomination

By Melchett Mike, April 17, 2011

Amongst the many eyebrow-raising sights witnessed on the streets of Tel Aviv is the odd (in both senses) one of the Israeli male sporting the German national football shirt.


The Witriol Diaries, Part IV (Hasmo Legends XXIII)

By Melchett Mike, March 27, 2011

Again, I am not going to post this one in full here, but if you are an ex-Hasmo - or merely curious to read the diary of a teacher in the madhouse in the 60s/70s - here is Part IV of The Witriol Diaries . . .




Is it just me?! (The Odelia Poll)

By Melchett Mike, March 23, 2011

If nothing else, melchett mike has always endeavoured to take an honest, warts and all approach (what, after all, is the purpose of a personal blog?) It is with this in mind that, swallowing a large dose of pride, I document my major dating talking point this month.


Itamar infanticide: The difference between us and them

By Melchett Mike, March 13, 2011

As news filtered through, yesterday morning, of the slaughter by Palestinians of five members of the same family – two parents and their children, aged 11, 4 and 3 months – an Israeli friend, Itzik, remarked merely “chayot” (animals). Benny Gantz, the new IDF Chief of Staff, used the term “chayot adam” (beasts).