Spaghetti doesn't grow on trees, but if it did, it would be at the Gragnano pasta factory. There are piles of the stuff everywhere, fresh from the mixer, hung up to dry and heaped on trays ready to be packaged and plated.
The smell of pasta - of Italy really - is in the air as chef Antonino explains in broken English the process of making the country's signature dish.
There can't be many links between Turkey Twizzlers and a dream Grecian holiday. But here's one. When Jamie Oliver condemned the Twizzler for being unhealthy during his school dinners TV series, the negative publicity sent sales soaring.
Suffolk is not as flat as you might think. From the road, the undulations seem gentle but if, for example, you should find yourself at the bottom of one of these undulations with two small children - both learning how to ride bikes - the hill can appear as daunting as the north face of Everest.
Golf can divide opinion to the point where a keen clubber's paradise is their partner's purgatory.
But on the southern Spanish coast, the 148-roomed NH Almenara Golf Hotel and Spa in Sotogrande is endeavouring to appeal to both the tee-time set and those for whom greens more readily conjure up images of
Sometimes the incongruous and the unexpected provide the happiest of marriages. As with Christmas in July, so with Switzerland in high summer.
There is still, for romantics, a bit of snow, right up at the top of the mountains. But everywhere else is like something from a child's colouring book: the greenest of green trees, the bluest of blue lakes and skies.
Commonly held wisdom says that if you see Chinese people eating in a Chinese restaurant, it must be a fine establishment. But does this apply to holidays?
There were a large number of Greek tourists holidaying in the South Pelopennese when I was there, something I did, indeed, take as a sign of its quality as a destination.
But then it occurred to me that resorts such as Margate and Blackpool are full of Brits in the summer and, wonderful as they are, I'm not sure that the glut of indigenous tourists quite qualifies them as top-notch holiday spots. I had two weeks to find out.
Love is one thing, and passion quite another. And when both are present, life can seem like a honeymoon. Alas, it's inevitable that the time will come in a couple's relationship when passions wane and the dimming embers need to be fanned into life. I suggest you find somewhere romantic to do this and I believe that I found the perfect place.
Seduced by the ancient cult history of godly love of Cyprus, we flew to Lanarka airport. From there, we taxied to Pissouri about an hour away - a peaceful but burgeoning hill-top village perched half way between Limassol (Lemesos) and Paphos.