I did my bit for crime prevention last Sunday after helping to restore order to the streets of Edgware. Having just completed a heavy session at the gym, I was pumped and had a take-no-prisoners attitude.
A drunk, armed with a bottle of wine and can of beer, had already been shown the door at Grodzinskis, across the road, and then tried to intimidate staff at Sharon's bakery.
The situation turned nasty when he asked for a sandwich containing bacon or ham. He then became abusive towards staff. But cometh the hour, cometh the man. I intervened and told him that his sort were not wanted here. He went with his tail between his legs. I don't expect to receive the freedom of Edgware or a bravery award but a small discount at the kosher eateries or deli would not go amiss.
A family from South Africa living in London has laid claim to being the best sporting one in the country. Marc Reingold, captain of Stanmore Cricket Club, saw his team finish runners-up in the Cockspur National Twenty20 competition.
The former South African schoolboys cricketer grew up playing alongside Jonty Rhodes and Alan Donald. He also played professional football for Hellenic.
Reingold, 39, helped his team beat St Just in the semi-finals at the Swalec Stadium in Cardiff. The left-handed all-rounder scored 13 off 12 balls. But his team was outfought in the final as they succumbed by 54 runs against South Northumberland.
Reingold said: "The better team won. Our boys have done well and beaten some hard teams to get here. We've enjoyed it."
The family tradition does not end there though as Reingold is the uncle of Rangers midfielder Dean Furman, currently on loan to Bradford City. And his other nephew, Jake, 17, plays for Wingate & Finchley reserves.
It is a well-known fact that I detest programmes such as Big Brother, X Factor, Pop Idol and Strictly Come Dancing. But even I could not resist watching a few minutes of Rachel Stevens and BBC's The One Show co-presenter Christine Bleakley. And I was pleased to see Rachel's fiancée Alex Bourne fighting his corner when asked what he thought about her dancing partner, Vincent Simone. "Flirting is OK," advised angry Alex, "as long as it's no more than that." That's a silent threat if ever I've heard one.
On that subject, Glenthorne United midfielder Matthew Geppart was an unused substitute against UJIA after upsetting his manager while running the line. Paul Silver was none too pleased when Geppart failed to flag for what he fumed was a "blatant offside" because he was too busy eyeing up the local talent on the sidelines. The resulting goal didn't help his cause.
L'Equipe hotshot Jason Miller wins my Player of the Month award for September. Neasden A pair Jamie Cole and Daniel Fox are Manager of the Month after steering last season's double winners to four straight victories.