The Diary

Life imitates art for bad jew

July 16, 2015

Labour MP Gerald Kaufman was branded "despicable and disgusting" last week, after claiming in Parliament that Israel uses the Holocaust to "justify the murder of Palestinians".

Later that evening, Conservative MP Michael Fabricant tweeted that he had "just been out to a brilliant play in London with a Labour MP friend. It's American and called Bad Jews.

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But did they sign a pre-nup?

July 16, 2015

Jewish dos are pricey. Maybe that is why hotel heir Nicky Hilton, worth £585 million, and James Rothschild, heir to a reported £454 trillion, eschewed the faith when they wed last week.

Although the bride is not Jewish, her husband is a scion of Mayer Amschel Rothschild, the German Jew who spawned a banking dynasty.

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That's so rock 'n' rollmops

July 16, 2015

Death metal, a subgenre of heavy metal, is known for its aggressive vocals and occasional nods to the occult.

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A tuneful state trip to Tehran

July 9, 2015

Forbes named her the most powerful woman on the planet, so it is only fitting that Angela Merkel travels with an impressive entourage.

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No more monkeying around

July 9, 2015

Escaping the jungle of north-west London, one JC reporter recently found herself in Monkey World in Dorset.

While there, she spotted a familiar flag amid the nationalities of rescued apes. Meet Gypsy, a chimpanzee who was born in Israel and was owned illegally, before being confiscated by Israeli authorities.

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Greece's phonographic crisis

July 9, 2015

News waits for no stenographer, so spare a thought for whoever writes BBC News' subtitles.

In what one can assume was a hasty error, the hapless individual misheard the newscaster and wrote there had been "more Jews at cashpoints" on the streets of Greece. Context would suggest he or she meant "queues".

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Excellent news, Smithers

July 9, 2015

Mr Burns is back. Only weeks after Harry Shearer, the actor who voices Homer Simpson's Machiavellian boss, said he was leaving The Simpsons, TV bosses revealed in a tweet that "all principal characters have now been signed" for its 27th and 28th seasons.

Those involved must be breathing a heavy sigh of relief.

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And last but not yeast

July 9, 2015

Harvey Odze was just one of many of our readers who celebrated the return of kosher Marmite to the UK.

But when he inquired into which version of the product Poundland would be selling, he was dismayed to learn that the 70g kosher spread was no longer on sale, despite Unilever confirming that it had been sold in bulk to the discount store.

Mr Odze believes he has solved the mystery of the mi

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The hip-hop rapping rabbi

July 2, 2015

Barmitzvah boy Gabe Knopf got more than he bargained for last Friday when his rabbi stood up and delivered a rap sermon.

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Care for a fan, Mr Miliband?

July 2, 2015

As Britain had its hottest day of the year on Wednesday, commuters were warned to dress light and stay hydrated. Unfortunately, it seems that Ed Miliband missed the memo.

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