After the Queen and wonder horse Frankel, one name is synonymous with Royal Ascot — Audrey Hepburn. Though her association with the Berkshire track is entirely filmic, her appearance there as reformed flower girl Eliza Doolittle has never been surpassed and every woman dressing for Ladies’ Day hopes to capture something of the My Fair Lady “Hep factor” in their choice of headwear.

The rumble in the fashion world started months ago. A new version of The Great Gatsby was on its way to a cinema near you and every manufacturer, boutique, hair salon and bar was prepared to embrace Art Deco design and jump on Baz Luhrmann’s dazzling bandwagon.

Brent Cross has never seen anything like it. Men who would ordinarily be shuffling through the centre in the wake of their born-to-shop spouses were suddenly parading like peacocks across the marble floor.

Do you think your man needs a makeover? Does your Dad need to dapper up his game? This is your chance to make that happen as Jeff Banks has kindly offered £250 spending money to a fella who needs a bit more fashion in his life. Whether it’s something casual for the weekend or a spanky suit for a big night out, the lucky winner can peruse the rails in the new Brent Cross store.

Forgive the short notice, but it’s Mother’s Day on Sunday. With its Lent/Easter associations the date understandably doesn’t feature on the Jewish calendar, so that gets me off the hook. With everyone — except my mother.

Hands up if you’ve bought a Prada blossom skirt yet? An iridescent Alberta Feretti dress to be worn with neon- trimmed trainers? Maybe a crop? No, me neither. It’s not that I’m not interested in the 2013 fashion trends, as nothing pleases me more than the thought of spring and fewer layers.

I couldn’t be more excited. Today the film version of the musical I love more than any other opens at cinemas nationwide. After 28 years on the stage, Alain Boublil and Claude-Michel Schönberg’s Les Misérables has been turned into a motion picture starring Hugh Jackman as Victor Hugo’s protagonist Jean Valjean, and I’ve bought my tickets. For every night next week.

When I worked in an office every day I was deeply envious of the women who didn’t. Not because their free time allowed them extended lunches and spontaneous shopping trips, but because they arrived at parties looking immaculate, while I turned up at the same soirees looking smudged and bedraggled.

I would like to apologise to my step-son Michael. About two years ago he walked into the kitchen wearing a bright green zip-up baby-gro. At least that is what it looked like and we all fell about laughing.

The email was polite and succinct. “Dear Brigit, we’ve managed to get you five minutes with Valentino at midday on Wednesday. Look forward to seeing you then. Kind regards…”