By Ben F
September 6, 2011
The Cohen Family
Once upon a time, there was a very nice family, the Cohens, living in North Manchester. Eventually they tired of the hustle and bustle of big city life and decided to move to a nice, quiet North Yorkshire town, Pickallerton. Pickallerton, demographically was entirely lilly white and Gentile, but this didn't fuss the Cohens. People are people.
They bought a nice plot of land and were just about to build their house when they were descended upon by a group of residents calling themselves the "admissions committee" which, it turned out, was popularly known in the region as the "prevent infiltration by Jews and blacks" committee.
This committee was allegedly self appointed and "administrative". Yet it seemed to have a great deal of power. The foundation of this mysterious power has never been adequately explained.
The committee informed the Cohens that they were not able to build a house in this town. The Cohens were non-plussed but remained self-possessed. They appealed to the Zionist Federation Vice-Chair, Jonathan Hoffman and his sidekick, Harvey, hoping that they might be able to organise a couple of demos on their behalf. The response from Harvey was a peremptory and unequivocal no. They were, he explained, too busy righting wrongs in Iran, Syria, and Basildon.
The Cohens appealed to the NYLA and their appeal was turned down. But all is well that ends well. Years later, the NYLA reversed the decision, probably because the Cohens had appealed to the UK Supreme Court which, in February of this year, had decided that Pickallerton admissions committee should reconsider the family's request. The court also ruled that if necessary, the request should be reconsidered by the NYLA's appeals committee and its Director General.
The couple then reappeared before the Pickallerton admissions committee, which again rejected them, arguing that Jews do not see Pickallerton as an organised community but rather, as an opportunist's way of escaping from the hell of North Manchester. It also argued that the couple's stance against the institution of the admissions committee, and the idea of the preservation of the nature of the community, were likely to be injurious to it.
Two weeks ago, the NYLA appeals committee reconsidered the case.
"After studying all the material, I have decided to accept the family's appeal", the Chairman, Colonel Blimp announced last Tuesday.
Pickallerton's legal counsel attacked the decision, calling it "strange".
The Cohens were delighted with the decision. "After six years, we are beginning to see the end and hope to begin to plan and build our home within a short time", they said.
Along with the Cohen's petition, the Supreme Court will also consider one against the admissions (committee) law, approved several months ago by Parliament.