A non-Jewish perspective


By Jon_i_Cohen
November 20, 2010
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Dennis Miller on the blockade of Gaza by Egypt and Israel

Let me share my current thoughts on the blockade of Gaza by Egypt and Israel - by Dennis Miller

For those of you who don't like Dennis Miller, who is not Jewish, you may want to reconsider after reading his brilliant comments that follow. Please pass it on to your friends.

For those who don't know, Dennis Miller is a comedian who has a show called Dennis Miller Live on HBO. Although he is not Jewish, he recently had the following to say about the Middle East situation:

"A brief overview of the situation is always valuable, so as a service to all Americans who still don't get it, I now offer you the story of the Middle East in just a few paragraphs, which is all you really need.

Here we go:

The Palestinians want their own country. There's just one thing about that: There are no Palestinians. It's a made up word. Israel was called Palestine for two thousand years. Like 'Wiccan,' 'Palestinian' sounds ancient but is really a modern invention. Before the Israelis won the land in the 1967 war, Gaza was owned by Egypt, the West Bank was owned by Jordan, and there were no 'Palestinians.'

As soon as the Jews took over and started growing oranges as big as basketballs, what do you know, say hello to the 'Palestinians,' weeping for their deep bond with their lost 'land' and 'nation.'

So for the sake of honesty, let's not use the word 'Palestinian' any more to describe these delightful folks, who dance for joy at our deaths until someone points out they're being taped. Instead, let's call them what they are: 'Other Arabs Who Can't Accomplish Anything In Life And Would Rather Wrap Themselves In The Seductive Melodrama Of Eternal Struggle And Death.' I know that's a bit unwieldy to expect to see on CNN. How about this, then: 'Adjacent Jew-Haters .' Okay, so the Adjacent Jew-Haters want their own country. Oops, just one more thing: No, they don't . They could've had their own country. Any time in the last thirty years, especially several years ago at Camp David . But If you have your own country, you have to have traffic lights and garbage trucks. And Chambers of Commerce, and, worse, you actually have to figure out some way to make a living.

That's no fun. No, they want what all the other Jew-Haters in the region want: Israel. They also want a big pile of dead Jews, of course that's where the real fun is -- but mostly they want Israel.

Why? For one thing, trying to destroy Israel - or 'The Zionist Entity' as their textbooks call it - for the last fifty years has allowed the rulers of Arab countries to divert the attention of their own people away from the fact that they're the blue-ribbon most illiterate, poorest, and tribally backward on God's Earth, and if you've ever been around God's Earth, you know that's really saying something.

It makes me roll my eyes every time one of our pundits waxes poetic about the great history and culture of the Muslim Mideast. Unless I'm missing something, the Arabs haven't given anything to the world since Algebra, and, by the way, thanks a hell of a lot for that one.

Chew this around and spit it out: Five hundred million Arabs; five Million Jews.

Think of all the Arab countries as a football field, and Israel as a pack of matches sitting in the middle of it. And now these same folks swear that if Israel gives them half of that pack of matches, everyone will be pals.

Really? Wow, what neat news. Hey, but what about the string of wars to obliterate the tiny country and the constant din of rabid blood oaths to drive very Jew into the sea? Oh, that? We were just kidding.

My friend, Kevin Rooney, made a gorgeous point the other day: Just reverse the numbers. Imagine five hundred million Jews and five million Arabs. I was stunned at the simple brilliance of it. Can anyone picture the Jews strapping belts of razor blades and dynamite to themselves? Of course not. Or marshaling every fiber and force at their disposal for generations to drive a tiny Arab State into the sea? Nonsense.

Or dancing for joy at the murder of Innocents? Impossible.

Or spreading and believing horrible lies about the Arabs baking their bread with the blood of children? Disgusting.

No, as you know, left to themselves in a world of peace, the worst Jews would ever do to people is debate them to death.

However, in any big-picture strategy, there's always a danger of losing moral weight. We've already lost some. After September 11th our President told us and the world he was going to root out all terrorists and the countries that supported them. Beautiful. Then the Israelis, after months and months of having the equivalent of an Oklahoma City every week (and then every day) start to do the same thing we did, and we tell them to show restraint.

If America was being attacked with an Oklahoma City every day, we would all very shortly be screaming for the administration to just be done with it and kill everything south of the Mediterranean and east of the Jordan.

If you agree, please pass it on … if you don’t .............

COMMENTS

jose (not verified)

20 November, 2010 - 22:42

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No, as you know, left to themselves in a world of peace, the worst Jews would ever do to people is debate them to death.

Looks like he has been exposed to the Two Stooges, Avraham and Tsam!


jose (not verified)

20 November, 2010 - 22:48

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Jon, check first your facts before posting:

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/overview.asp

Remember, any text requesting to be forwarded to others should be checked and any factual error in it should be a reason not to forward it, as there might be a number of others as well.

The text was one of LARRY MILLER, for one.


jose (not verified)

20 November, 2010 - 23:40

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And by the way, LARRY Miller IS Jewish.


Jon_i_Cohen

21 November, 2010 - 09:35

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Check YOUR facts before posting jose; as the article quotes and I have acknowledged, the article was written by DENNIS Miller NOT LARRY Miller.


Jon_i_Cohen

21 November, 2010 - 09:41

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Jon_i_Cohen

21 November, 2010 - 09:48

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Jewish American...

21 November, 2010 - 10:56

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"The Palestinians want their own country. There's just one thing about that. There are no Palestinians. It's a made up word...."

There were no Israelis until very recent history. Israel is a made up word. There weren't even that many Jews in Palestine until recently eg: barely 60,000 in the early part of the 19th century. In the light of these facts, a sharing of the land on the basis of the pre-1967 borders would seem like a pretty good deal.

It's a good thing Dennis Miller is a better comedian than he is a geo-political analyst.


amber

21 November, 2010 - 11:29

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Excellent piece Jon - thanks!


amber

21 November, 2010 - 11:33

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No Jewish American (where do they dig these people up from?)

Zionism is the expression of the Jewish people for self-determination. Jews' connection to the land is not a recent invention, and the use of the term "Israeli" is simply athe modern word for this most ancient of connections.

The "Palestinian" connection (if it is that) is iteslf a modern phenomenon, without roots.

This isn't about terminology.


Jon_i_Cohen

21 November, 2010 - 11:40

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"Jewish" American has obviously no knowledge of The Bible, History or Archaeology or would not have made such a ridiculous comment


jose (not verified)

21 November, 2010 - 11:56

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Sorry Jon, but your sources are not correct. I sustain that it was Larry Miller. Please check YOUR facts.
Apart from Snopes, indeed the best source to debug chain letters, you also have Wikipedia entry for Larry Miller.


jose (not verified)

21 November, 2010 - 11:58

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And as I pointed out Larry Miller IS Jewish, hence your title is inappropriate.
The text written includes also paragraphs not written by either Larry or Dennis Miller.


Yoni1

21 November, 2010 - 12:22

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"There were no Israelis until very recent history. Israel is a made up word. There weren't even that many Jews in Palestine until recently eg: barely 60,000 in the early part of the 19th century. In the light of these facts, a sharing of the land on the basis of the pre-1967 borders would seem like a pretty good deal."

This is stupid and ignorant on so many levels it's difficult to know where to begin. Let me try:

1. The Jewish Nation has been called Am Israel (the People of Israel) for many centuries, named after their tradiditional founder, Jacob (aka Israel).

2. There was a Jewish Kingdom of Israel from ca. 1000 BC to ca. 700 BC.

3. The reason there were so few Jews in Israel ('Palestine' is a made-up name) is because they were expelled from their homeland. If you have trouble understanding the word 'expelled', buy yourself a dictionary.

4. There were no 'pre-1967 borders'. Those were ceasefire lines.

5. The original LoN Palestine mandate included a huge area east of the river Jordan, which was then cut off illegally, given to an imported Arab robber baron and made Judenrein.

That's enough for now. Any time you want me to explain the alphabet to you, don't hesitate to give me a shout.


jose (not verified)

21 November, 2010 - 12:43

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Yoni, JewishAmerican doesn't know fact from fiction, History from lullabies that his 'Palestinian' parents told him.

Even the 'Palestinians' in 1948 did not use that term to describe themselves. They were described as Arabs, who happened to have settled in Mandatory Palestine or Ottomanic Palestine? They came from present Jordan, present Syria, present Lebanon, Egypt, present Iraq, present Iran, etc.

But present-day 'Palestinians' are submitted to propaganda from babyhood to their death.


jose (not verified)

21 November, 2010 - 12:43

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And Larry Miller, the real author of Jon's text, IS jewish.

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